On April 5, 2008, Hollywood Legend Charlton Heston died at the age of 83.

Good bye Charlton Heston, you will be greatly missed by civil right activists, your fans, and gun nuts alike.

On a side note, there are much reprussions resulting from the death of Charlton Heston...
1.) Anti-gun activists will soon lauch Operation Disarm to pry Heston's Brooks flintlock rifle from his cold, dead hand.
2.) Ape rights activists have declared that they will picket Heston's funeral over his remark of "Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape!"

I will remember your words, "from my cold dead hand!" when my government tried to seize my stash of weapons.

http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/04/0...ead/index.html
 

What? You think I want to shoot an ignorant old lady? Fuck you.
 

The police never caught her you say? So she was allowed to just shoot at somebody and then walk off?

Man. Sounds like if somebody had had a gun they could have done something about that.
 

I don't have to explain myself to you. I was shot (not maced, not beaten by a brick in her purse. SHOT) by an old lady who thought I tried to steal her purse, in the middle of the day downtown, as my friends and I walked by. She scurred off as my shoulder bled out. 5 inches and I wouldn't be here. We never caught the bitch.

So
A) sorry if I'm not an advocate of handguns for all.
and
B) sorry if i have no remorse for the passing of a man who advocated that kind of bullshit.

Guns are for the weak. They're not going away, and I've never expected them to. But to place them in the hands of people who clearly don't deserve them... I'd rather die than support that.
 

Flame WAR!!!!!! Should have seen this one coming........ But that WAS FUCKED UP DS!
 

Get on DemoSquid
 

FROM HIS COLD DEAD HANDS LIBERALS!!! FROM HIS COLD DEAD HANDS!!!!



On side note: It's hard to see an old guy like Heston died man, so many memories! RIP HESTON!
 

Why was he a prick? Because he disagreed with you? Did you know him or are you simply demonizing him based on video clips and abstract news blurbs? Why did he offend you so? Furthermore, assuming you are anti-gun, then it would also figure that you are anti-death, so why are you celebrating a mans death? What possible motive could you have to celebrate the demise a a fellow human being that has done no harm to anyone so far as you are aware? Please explain how you can both celebrate and denounce death and not be labeled a hypocrite? I can't wait to hear this.

Were you shot? Even so, did the gun fire itself? Did it miraculously and spontaneously gain the power of rationale thought? Did it develop appendages in order to properly aim itself in your direction? I'm curious to know about this new breed of firearm, capable of self-firing and self-aiming. I reckon you could sell millions of these on the black market.
 

Ha. Talk to me again when you've been shot. Then you'll see my world.
 

YES! YESSSSSSSSSSSS! FINALLY!

HALLELUYA! PRAISE THE DEVIL W00T!

What a prick.
 

Karma.

Soon.
 

While I am not a gun fan by any means, I liked the movies of his that I saw. He was a good actor, and it is a sad day when good actors die.
 

Now they can pry that gun from his cold, dead hands.

/yes I stole that from Fark, ya wanna fight about it?
 

"Take your stinking paws off me, you damn dirty ape!"
 

Tool AEnima... +Rep?
 

A plus rep is fine too
 

 

Justice is blind?
 

It makes perfect sense. You're making the assumption the old woman who shot you was carrying a legally concealed weapon. You don't know that.

From the information you've given us, she's more of a criminal than a law-abiding citizen, so your views on the laws are therefore irrelevant. Criminals don't follow laws, or at least they don't in my perception of reality.
 

OK, let's look at the logic at this.

You bump into an old chick. Now, let's assume that it takes about five seconds for a normal man to pull out his hand gun and shoot you. For the old lady, ten seconds.

Why in the utter fuck would she do that if you just bumped into her? It's not even a split-second decision, like if she said "fuck you!" to you if you bumped into her. She would have to make a conscious decision to take out her gun from her purse or her holster or whatever and shoot you.

But I'll tell you what; post a pic of your shoulder where you were shot and we'll believe you.
 

Fuck L Ron Hubbard and
Fuck all his clones.
Fuck all these gun-toting
Hip gangster wannabes.

Fuck retro anything.
Fuck your tattoos.
Fuck all you junkies and
Fuck your short memory.

Fuck smiley glad-hands
With hidden agendas.
Fuck these dysfunctional,
Insecure actresses.

/learn to swim
 

Go Go Stereotypes! I'm done being nice. You're a fucking idiot. There, I said it.
 

If womanizer can truely lose an eyeball, I don't think it's unreasonable that I was fucking shot by an old lady who freaked out when I accidently bumped into her on the street. I still don't have the range of motion I used to in that shoulder, and I was shot over 3 years ago.

Fuck guns, and fuck all you toting hicks.
 

Only in Canada! BLAME CANADA!! Damn I want to hear that song again!
 

JT delivers

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=44P8C4VJkN4
 

Yes, I did. They turned up nothing. Pigs round here are useless, even with carrying the guns you all love so much.
 

Fenix REPS!
 

I got shot once, although it wasnt exactly like DSquids story... It wasnt in broad day light, more of a dimly lit room. There were a lot of people around though! Only they were all standing around me in a circle... But they did shoot me! Only they didnt use a gun... But the projectile left a mark! Well, more of a stain... when it dried. Now that I think of it, I think I was doing gay porn. Well at least my story is more believable... Nothing a bout of intense therapy cant repress.
 

NO because clearly they wouldn't have charged the old lady with anything because she's, like, OLD. You know? Just imagine a little old lady sitting in prison for shooting an innocent punk kid, what that would look like. SHE WOULD BE SO SAD AND COLD! And obviously the police can't allow that to happen... God, don't you know anything about the justice system, JT?
 

His story reeks of fucking bullshit. I mean, some old bat shoots him in broad daylight and nobody calls the cop, not even DemoSquid? He either lives in the stupidest city in the world or it's all bullshit.
 

Yeah, at least if he is a pussy he has a semi-badass scar on his shoulder.
 

I prefer to believe that it's real. Better that we think him a pussy than a liar.
 

Yea he clearly made this shit up, bottom line.
 

No, not really, just in general not be such a pussy ass bitch that you led an old lady walk away after shooting you.
 

No matter how I think about this, it comes up hilarious.
 

"thou shalt not KILL"
kabooommmm 1920s sfx!!!!!!!!11!!1
 

haha

The best part is that, assuming Demo's story is factual, the old lady actually commited a crime: attempted murder. A shot above the waist that does not kill, if I remember correctly, counts as attempted murder in the court system.

So, to recap: an old woman committed a crime, thus violating a law, and Demo thinks a gun ban will work.

Yes, Demo, criminals follow the law. That's why they're characterized by their deviant behavior.

/palmface
 

Can't forget this moment:



Totally took me out of the movie and made me think 1) why the fuck did the director call for this (probably a goddamned furry), and 2) how did Charlton Heston agree to do this.

Also, in googling that, I found Rule 34 on Planet of the Apes. Fuck you, internet, fuck you.
 

Don't you think I tried? It's kind of hard to focus on catching the person who just shot you, when you're still trying to come to terms with the fact YOU'VE JUST BEEN SHOT. Not to mention when your friends are all huddled around you making sure you're ok, blocking your view.

Get shot unexpectedly. Do it. See how good your reaction time is.
 

That makes no sense at all. She shot me in ill-informed self defence, she wouldn't be punished cause she was old and ignorant. My beef is with letting stupid old ladies carry guns at all - something Heston advocated fully. And I cannot respect a man who thinks its wise to put weapons in the hand of people who will use them irresponcibly, such as the elderly and children.

Which probably makes me as much of a bastard as Heston himself, but I can live with that. Long live the taser and mace.
 

So what? You'd hunt her down?

I'm guess I'm not as greedy or vengeful as you.
 

If only he had gotten stabbed in the eye, that would delightfully ironic.
 

The people in the Starcraft 2 forums are going to have a field day!!
 

Guns are for the weak?

Yup. Right.
 

So let's ban anything dangerous so idiots don't hurt themselves and others, amirite?
 

Oh god. I'm sorry, but this just reeks of awesomeness.

Ninja Gunslinger Granny - 1
DemoSquid - 0





Demo, we all appreciate your venerated presence and your strong dislike of firearms, but I don't think Heston has to blame for that.
 

I would assume that since you took the time to post a morbid celebration of the passing of a human being that you were inviting conversation on the topic, no?

And so you blame the gun? Perhaps I'm a bit slow, but shouldn't you be blaming the old lady? Maybe you should celebrate the passing of the founder of AARP?

Nobody said you had to be pro-gun, I am asking you to be pro-human being.
Having no remorse and opening celebrating death are two very distinct behaviors. Your exact quote was "YES! YESSSSSSSSSSSS! FINALLY!....HALLELUYA! PRAISE THE DEVIL W00T!......What a prick" This is not an absence of remorse, this is a celebration of death. And could you kindly point out where Chuck Heston advocated old ladies shooting stupid teenagers? I seemed to have missed that.

Your weak ass got shot by a grandma, how weak is that?

Well, I'm sorry to say that you lived. What's more ironic is that you would rather die for a cause that you don't understand than to learn something about personal responsibility.

Right, you just get a kick out of death, that's all.

By the way, you never answered my question. What exactly did Chuck Heston do to you? I would really like to know what legislation he supported that caused your old lady to obtain a gun and shoot you.
 

I'd stop the woman that just fucking shot me from walking away, yea.
 

So, did you file a police report? If someone just randomly shot me in the shoulder, that's what I would do.